- My thoughts/adventures in polyamory and life.
- 17 DOs and DON'Ts of Open Relationships
- How My Three-Way Polyamorous Relationship Works
- 24 Questions About Gay Polyamorous Relationships You Wanted to Ask But Were Too Polite To
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That was a strategy; we didn't tell him until we hit South of the Border in South Carolina.
17 DOs and DON'Ts of Open Relationships
With four people it's difficult to book hotel rooms on travel sites since most availabilities and deals are based on double occupancy. Sure, we get to split a hotel room among four people with four salaries, but we don't always get the best rates. Which means the pressure's off to do anything. If one of us wants to see his [non-poly] family, then that's perfectly okay. He can visit them, and we'll stay home and do our own thing. The idea of a complicit descent of obligation does not exist in this house. Nothing's a requirement in that way, including things like gift-giving.
All right, let's finish up by discussing sex and intimacy. How are the two different in your current relationship from your respective past monogamous ones? I think everyone in general secretly wants to sleep with someone else. When you're with one person, you can grow tired of him very easily. If you've gone on a long vacation with one person, or had a roommate in college, or even had a monogamous relationship, you realize that things ebb and flow.
Like, I could have a really strong connection with Jason, including passionate sex with him, but it will ebb. When it cools off and maybe becomes a little more practical, we can relate to each other in a whole other way, while interacting physically intimately with John and Sid, or not.
I just think it's better that there are so many more ways to freely express and explore ourselves. Expanding on what Mark is saying, because we're dealing with four different people with four different schedules, timing - and I know I'm taking a very pragmatic approach to this - you get options; there is inherent variation as part of this dynamic. And then you're free to join, not join, watch, not watch, whatever you want to do. There's no obligation. Tap here to turn on desktop notifications to get the news sent straight to you. And polyamory is not polygamy.
So what is the distinction between polyamory and polygamy? We make all of our decisions independent of what the government ordains or recommends. But, as it stands now, our parents would probably have to get involved. What's the number one question you are asked? And what's the answer?! What about spooning?
Who spoons whom, if there's any spooning at all? We are all over each other. I usually have to use the bathroom, so I scoot down the bed. I'm sometimes asked who the "alpha" is. There is none. It depends on what it is.
If it's tech-related, I'm in charge. Kitchen is more Sid. Breadwinning is kind of Jason. And the bills? This kind of leads into scheduling, and making time for each other. Facebook Messenger is really effective; it's been a good platform for us. It's essentially a group text. You can see who's read what and when. You can also see where a message has been sent from. Pretty much we can track each other through GPS.
But it's all very passive. I actually enjoyed myself that time. What about the logistics of traveling? We have three vehicles, and one is a minivan.
Thankfully, that hasn't been an issue. Yeah, I'm a staunch atheist. And no one gets jealous? We do have a sex policy, though. If somebody wants to get off, he gives everyone at least a five-minute notice. But what if nobody's interested at that moment? That rarely happens. Somebody's libido will invariably be up for it.
Canada U. US News. Our wedding was held at our small Craftsman house in Hollywood.
How My Three-Way Polyamorous Relationship Works
My best friend Amy flew with her family from New York City to officiate. Over a people showed up. Jon stood in the back of the room during the ceremony. Later Jon told us how stressed out he was. We had all underestimated the timing. The emotions that would come up through out the day.
24 Questions About Gay Polyamorous Relationships You Wanted to Ask But Were Too Polite To
We seem to do that a lot. Underestimate what is happening until it is over, and we are left thinking: In time this thing that seemed so far outside the norm, so far outside what was acceptable, began to feel normal. Life began to fill back in. Jobs and goals and the gym, paying the bills: No longer was there just two of us. We were three. I think that was the hardest part: Eventually I began to see this not just as one relationship but as four completely whole and separate relationships: Then there are our relationships to our selves.
Carving out time to be alone. Finding a way to remain autonomous inside this thing that can easily consume you. I met him at the bar where I was working at the time and took him into one of the back rooms. He was just supposed to be a hook up, some random hot dude, just another adventure. And then we met the following week in the parking lot of my gym.
We messed around in the bathroom at the bar. We had sex in a parking structure after getting bagels.